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ellerDouble knives are a great thing: you have a larger blade for rough work, a smaller blade for detail work, and you wear them in the same sheath for easy access. A blade for every occasion! I (unironically) love the concept - it's very practical. However... This also happens to be the type of item that tourists love to bring as a souvenir from Finland.
Let's take a look at a very touristy product.
The tacky brand name (Wood Jewel) and the equally tacky pseudo-traditional pictures on the sheath make the target group immediately clear: this is for tourists. However, that doesn't automatically mean these are bad blades, right? Let's be optimistic. Maybe these are perfectly decent knives just marketed in a supremely tacky way... Right?!?
On paper, the specifics are not too bad: the carbon steel blades are industrially produced (which, I'm afraid, is unavoidable with knives in this price bracket) by Laurin Metalli, which is actually one of the better industrial producers. The handles consist of birch and reindeer antler. That's very traditional and actually fulfills a practical purpose: antler is very porous and does not only serve as an anti-sweat anti-slip measure but also... These rings of different materials offer a contrast that mean you'll always know where your hand is on the handle, which is... kind of important for safety reasons. (Remember that this was made north of the polar circle. Polar night is a thing. These blades may have to be used under shitty sight conditions. So, think of these classical multi-material handles as knife braille or something: it makes sure these knives can literally be used blind. Children, don't try this at home: it still takes a bit of experience to do so safely. But, anyway, the contrast in the handle materials helps a lot.) The wood is a thermal insulator. Here, it's not the highest wood quality, but... again, perfectly acceptable for the price. I'm not objecting to the materials.
Uh. Several problems are immediately noticeable: firstly, the weirdly bumpy knife handles (I think we've already established how grip aids are for Americans) that are neither ergonomic nor have any kind of practical purpose. (They make the knives considerably less safe because it's not really possible to get any kind of good grip on them. I tried.) It's like someone just said, 'Oh, these Americans love weird random bumps on their knife handles? Sure thing. Can do.' I mean, I don't categorically object to knife handles deviating from the 'streamlined' form, but... These deviations should have a function. They should support the purpose of the blade in question. In this case, they don't. (The broadening at the end has a purpose: that's to make it easier to use while wearing gloves, so you don't slip off the rear during a draw cut. The bump in the middle, however? WTF.) This is just bumpy fuckery.
Secondly, the sheath is crap. I don't mean the concept, which is perfectly fine - it's just that it's so badly made that when I received the blades, they were under a lot of strain, and I have not managed to get them back inside in any kind of safe or sane manner. They just don't fit. The angle is wrong. Impossible to show this in a photo, but, yeah, supremely crappy leatherworking. Which is a shame, because a good double sheath is extremely valuable (not least because it's extremely difficult to make... Oh, WAIT) and in this case would actually be more valuable than the knife itself. XD Yeah, no surprise 'Wood Jewel' doesn't offer a decent sheath with this double knife. It's impossible for the price. Still: I think it would be more honest to just sell the knife without a fucking sheath than to deliver this.
Thirdly, the fact that there are thin liners between wood and antler is a bad sign: it's a typical sign of crappy knifemaking. It's what mediocre knifemakers do when they can't get the wood and the antler to fit together properly: just put something elastic and easily deformed (like leather or birchbark) in between and press. It solves the problem, right? XD Ahem. In cheap knives, it's a sign of shoddy work and has a really bad reputation. Of course, there are exceptions: I have seen this used as a stylistic element on some excellent knives! In those cases, it's purely decorative! (The difference is difficult to put in words, but also really obvious when you see it: completely regular pressure, and all that. It's like the difference between a strategically ripped designer jeans and phenomenally crappy textile work.) In this case, though? Definitely used as a shortcut for not having to grind the pieces of the handle properly. This is probably also the reason why the company is able to sell knives at a really low price: shortcuts save work hours. I'd estimate that adding these liners saved, like, two or three hours of high-precision grinding... (Technical note: grinding antler is difficult because it's a) hard, b) porous, c) brittle, d) very heterogeneous, and e) somewhat sensitive to heat. In case it's not obvious to you: this means it's one of the shittiest materials for grinding you could imagine, and machines can't do it. A knife where antler and wood are ground so precisely they fit together without liners would have to be much more expensive.)
The other problems are in the details.
Traces of epoxy (which was used to fix the tang into the handle) all over the place are not always a sign of shoddy work. They might be fully intentional. There's a phenomenon I personally call Northern Knifemaking Grunge, in which the makers of real (non-tourist) knives occasionally mess with their knives in small ways that don't impede the safety or function but serve to make the knife less interesting for collectors. No one likes knife collectors. (And we've already witnessed what happens if a knife collector ends up buying a real knife by accident.) Germans do this as well!
[Cultural note: this is sometimes misinterpreted as trying to avoid 'cultural appropriation', that is, trying to keep the knives within the culture / nationality. However, that's not really what this is about... It's just the horror of contextual appropriation, that is, removing the knife from its knife-ness (by, say, putting it in a glass case). By doing so, you also dehumanize the maker: blademaking is not a job, it's an identity. All over northern Europe, buying knives you don't intend to use is extremely offensive. I'm really only doing that with the shittiest knives I see because, in that case, I see the implied insult as justified and refuse to feel bad about it.]
However, in this case? With a product aimed at tourists who just want a souvenir? Yeah, no. Not a cultural defense mechanism, merely shitty work.
And it gets worse. LOOK AT THAT GRIND!
I mean... What is this even supposed to be? A completely botched saber grind? A high Scandinavian grind with an inexplicable added microbevel? (Hint: this type of knife is not supposed to have a microbevel. ABSOLUTELY NOT.) This is actually a new one for me: a botched grind is common enough, but usually, I can at least tell what type of grind the knifemaker fucked up. What do we call this? Aleatory Grind, because of its inherent randomness?)
Initially, I was kind of curious (in a morbid way) how that's going to perform in practice. Maybe that's just an American thing that's otherwise unknown in Northern Europe but will perform perfectly fine? However, a closer look at the blade tips convinced me otherwise. View from above:
Aleatory Grind it is.
Look, if something looks like this, don't even test it. I'm very serious, here: this is dangerous. I mean, the left one (the larger blade) is almost okay (if you're generous about these things), but the right one? I mean. That tip is supposed to be symmetrical on a Scandi. This is a major fuck-up and bad enough I'd consider it a serious safety risk. You see something like that on a knife? DO NOT USE. Hands off. Flying metal shards are no fun.
Full disclosure: the intended target group actually seems to be happy with the product. I found several quite positive reviews. It's fascinating!
For example, this guy purchased the smaller blade separately. His review is utterly fascinating - pay attention to the things he considers important and those he doesn't! (How the fuck do you review a knife without even mentioning the grind?!?) To be fair, he seems to have been lucky and received one with a not-completely-mangled tip - the one he got looks significantly better than mine - so I can kind of understand his lack of outrage, but... How do I say this? He seems to be pretty clueless about the design elements, their general purpose, and what they're supposed to look like. If he's the typical target group of these knives, then, yeah, fantastic product. XD
Let's take a look at a very touristy product.
The tacky brand name (Wood Jewel) and the equally tacky pseudo-traditional pictures on the sheath make the target group immediately clear: this is for tourists. However, that doesn't automatically mean these are bad blades, right? Let's be optimistic. Maybe these are perfectly decent knives just marketed in a supremely tacky way... Right?!?
On paper, the specifics are not too bad: the carbon steel blades are industrially produced (which, I'm afraid, is unavoidable with knives in this price bracket) by Laurin Metalli, which is actually one of the better industrial producers. The handles consist of birch and reindeer antler. That's very traditional and actually fulfills a practical purpose: antler is very porous and does not only serve as an anti-sweat anti-slip measure but also... These rings of different materials offer a contrast that mean you'll always know where your hand is on the handle, which is... kind of important for safety reasons. (Remember that this was made north of the polar circle. Polar night is a thing. These blades may have to be used under shitty sight conditions. So, think of these classical multi-material handles as knife braille or something: it makes sure these knives can literally be used blind. Children, don't try this at home: it still takes a bit of experience to do so safely. But, anyway, the contrast in the handle materials helps a lot.) The wood is a thermal insulator. Here, it's not the highest wood quality, but... again, perfectly acceptable for the price. I'm not objecting to the materials.
Uh. Several problems are immediately noticeable: firstly, the weirdly bumpy knife handles (I think we've already established how grip aids are for Americans) that are neither ergonomic nor have any kind of practical purpose. (They make the knives considerably less safe because it's not really possible to get any kind of good grip on them. I tried.) It's like someone just said, 'Oh, these Americans love weird random bumps on their knife handles? Sure thing. Can do.' I mean, I don't categorically object to knife handles deviating from the 'streamlined' form, but... These deviations should have a function. They should support the purpose of the blade in question. In this case, they don't. (The broadening at the end has a purpose: that's to make it easier to use while wearing gloves, so you don't slip off the rear during a draw cut. The bump in the middle, however? WTF.) This is just bumpy fuckery.
Secondly, the sheath is crap. I don't mean the concept, which is perfectly fine - it's just that it's so badly made that when I received the blades, they were under a lot of strain, and I have not managed to get them back inside in any kind of safe or sane manner. They just don't fit. The angle is wrong. Impossible to show this in a photo, but, yeah, supremely crappy leatherworking. Which is a shame, because a good double sheath is extremely valuable (not least because it's extremely difficult to make... Oh, WAIT) and in this case would actually be more valuable than the knife itself. XD Yeah, no surprise 'Wood Jewel' doesn't offer a decent sheath with this double knife. It's impossible for the price. Still: I think it would be more honest to just sell the knife without a fucking sheath than to deliver this.
Thirdly, the fact that there are thin liners between wood and antler is a bad sign: it's a typical sign of crappy knifemaking. It's what mediocre knifemakers do when they can't get the wood and the antler to fit together properly: just put something elastic and easily deformed (like leather or birchbark) in between and press. It solves the problem, right? XD Ahem. In cheap knives, it's a sign of shoddy work and has a really bad reputation. Of course, there are exceptions: I have seen this used as a stylistic element on some excellent knives! In those cases, it's purely decorative! (The difference is difficult to put in words, but also really obvious when you see it: completely regular pressure, and all that. It's like the difference between a strategically ripped designer jeans and phenomenally crappy textile work.) In this case, though? Definitely used as a shortcut for not having to grind the pieces of the handle properly. This is probably also the reason why the company is able to sell knives at a really low price: shortcuts save work hours. I'd estimate that adding these liners saved, like, two or three hours of high-precision grinding... (Technical note: grinding antler is difficult because it's a) hard, b) porous, c) brittle, d) very heterogeneous, and e) somewhat sensitive to heat. In case it's not obvious to you: this means it's one of the shittiest materials for grinding you could imagine, and machines can't do it. A knife where antler and wood are ground so precisely they fit together without liners would have to be much more expensive.)
The other problems are in the details.
Traces of epoxy (which was used to fix the tang into the handle) all over the place are not always a sign of shoddy work. They might be fully intentional. There's a phenomenon I personally call Northern Knifemaking Grunge, in which the makers of real (non-tourist) knives occasionally mess with their knives in small ways that don't impede the safety or function but serve to make the knife less interesting for collectors. No one likes knife collectors. (And we've already witnessed what happens if a knife collector ends up buying a real knife by accident.) Germans do this as well!
[Cultural note: this is sometimes misinterpreted as trying to avoid 'cultural appropriation', that is, trying to keep the knives within the culture / nationality. However, that's not really what this is about... It's just the horror of contextual appropriation, that is, removing the knife from its knife-ness (by, say, putting it in a glass case). By doing so, you also dehumanize the maker: blademaking is not a job, it's an identity. All over northern Europe, buying knives you don't intend to use is extremely offensive. I'm really only doing that with the shittiest knives I see because, in that case, I see the implied insult as justified and refuse to feel bad about it.]
However, in this case? With a product aimed at tourists who just want a souvenir? Yeah, no. Not a cultural defense mechanism, merely shitty work.
And it gets worse. LOOK AT THAT GRIND!
I mean... What is this even supposed to be? A completely botched saber grind? A high Scandinavian grind with an inexplicable added microbevel? (Hint: this type of knife is not supposed to have a microbevel. ABSOLUTELY NOT.) This is actually a new one for me: a botched grind is common enough, but usually, I can at least tell what type of grind the knifemaker fucked up. What do we call this? Aleatory Grind, because of its inherent randomness?)
Initially, I was kind of curious (in a morbid way) how that's going to perform in practice. Maybe that's just an American thing that's otherwise unknown in Northern Europe but will perform perfectly fine? However, a closer look at the blade tips convinced me otherwise. View from above:
Aleatory Grind it is.
Look, if something looks like this, don't even test it. I'm very serious, here: this is dangerous. I mean, the left one (the larger blade) is almost okay (if you're generous about these things), but the right one? I mean. That tip is supposed to be symmetrical on a Scandi. This is a major fuck-up and bad enough I'd consider it a serious safety risk. You see something like that on a knife? DO NOT USE. Hands off. Flying metal shards are no fun.
Full disclosure: the intended target group actually seems to be happy with the product. I found several quite positive reviews. It's fascinating!
For example, this guy purchased the smaller blade separately. His review is utterly fascinating - pay attention to the things he considers important and those he doesn't! (How the fuck do you review a knife without even mentioning the grind?!?) To be fair, he seems to have been lucky and received one with a not-completely-mangled tip - the one he got looks significantly better than mine - so I can kind of understand his lack of outrage, but... How do I say this? He seems to be pretty clueless about the design elements, their general purpose, and what they're supposed to look like. If he's the typical target group of these knives, then, yeah, fantastic product. XD
no subject
Date: 2024-02-01 12:49 am (UTC)...I think terribad American fantasy novel cover art, TV shows, roleplaying game art, video game art, etc. have a LOT to answer for if the target market is rando Americans. (I am a rando American.)
:continues to save for an actual good puukko for whittling and hopefully working up to some tiny baby-steps woodworking:
no subject
Date: 2024-02-01 01:16 am (UTC)...and even without that issue, it's not the kind of knife I would want to take on a polar expedition. This is really as bad as it gets. The grind is really mind-boggling, though: I suspect it was supposed to be a scandi (with mysterious microbevel), but I'm not 100% sure. It's a mystery!
"...I think terribad American fantasy novel cover art, TV shows, roleplaying game art, video game art, etc. have a LOT to answer for if the target market is rando Americans. (I am a rando American.)"
Not really? I mean, the art is usually not detailed enough to make things like a knife grind visible. I think the problem is just that people didn't learn how to use knives, and don't know what to look for when buying one. That would not happen if standard education focused not only on reading and counting but also on at least (very) basic craft skills. I mean, rando Americans wanting to have pretty knives is not an inherent problem at all, as long as those rando Americans know how to hold a knife. It's just the total cluelessness of the typical tourist that forces knifemakers to
A) produce some really weird crap for the resulting market, or
B) self-sabotage their knives (in non-dangerous ways) to make sure they really end up with people who can use knives. (There are some really comical examples of this; I always enjoy seeing it.)
":continues to save for an actual good puukko for whittling and hopefully working up to some tiny baby-steps woodworking:"
WHEEEE! I also should do more woodworking. :)